Post Updated on December 27, 2019
I’m going to start this post off with a little story. We’re about to get personal, yo.
If you’re a regular reader of my blog, you’ve probably gathered that I’m a pretty motivated and confident person who believes in myself and my dreams. Unfortunately, there have been times in the past when I haven’t always prioritized my own values, and I’ve let myself get caught up with toxic people who made me second-guess my worth.
One of these toxic people was a guy I dated for a short while (the word dated is used very loosely here) who I pushed everything aside for. I wasn’t in a particularly good place in my life anyway, and all I wanted was for him to like me. I would put off doing my schoolwork, I stopped exercising, I ate terribly, and I sat and stared at my phone waiting for him to text when I should have been working.
Did he do any of that for me? You bet your bottom dollar he did not.
I kept trying to justify his actions (of being a generally sketchy and non-committal person), but really I was just making excuses for him. I overvalued him, and undervalued myself. Eventually it fizzled out because I realized what I had been doing to myself just to impress someone else. And I didn’t want to do that anymore.
I had more important things to do with my time, y’know?
That’s when I decided that I was going to be a high-value person.
What am I talking about when I say high-value person? I mean that you value yourself and know your worth. You have the confidence and integrity to go after your dreams, desires, wants, and needs without relying on anyone else to give you value. You prioritize yourself.
Once I started embracing this high-value mentality, I started to feel more in control of my life. Sometimes it’s hard when your friends, family, co-workers, or clients seem to be in need of your undivided attention. Maybe you’re even letting social media dictate your life, or putting your dreams on hold because you’re distracted.
If you’re doing any of the above, you’re not taking yourself seriously enough. But I guarantee that once you start valuing yourself, you’ll notice that people will respect you and your time more.
So are you a high-value person? Here are 3 ways to tell.
3 Ways To Tell You’re A High-Value Person
You don’t push your priorities aside for others.
This doesn’t mean you’re selfish and put your own needs before others all the time. You just recognize when other people are worth your time. Think of that famous quote that says, ‘Don’t make someone a priority when they only make you an option.’ That’s solid advice.
Yes, you should do things for other people without expecting anything in return, but you also can’t put your own priorities and responsibilities aside for another person who simply does not value you. A high-value person has goals and aspirations that they will work towards without letting anyone get in the way.
How to do it: Let people know what you’re working on. Tell them how important it is to you, and don’t apologize for the way you spend your time.
You are unapologetically you.
You know your own worth, so you don’t try to get it from other people. You aren’t trying to do things for a reaction, or acting a certain way to impress someone else. Instead of worrying about how others perceive you, you’re out there making your dreams happen. Sure, people might tell you you’re crazy or doing it the wrong way, but you go ahead with your plan because you know it’s right for you. You trust your intuition, and let it guide you in the right direction.
You also have a great deal of self-awareness (aka your most important asset), which means you recognize your strengths and weaknesses without anyone else pointing them out to you.
How to do it: If you find yourself stretching or hiding the truth from someone because of how they might judge you, remember that the only person you need to impress in life is yourself. Don’t try to hide the quirky things that make you who you are.
You know your standards.
You set yourself standards, and you communicate them to others. If you don’t like the way someone is behaving, you let them know why it’s not vibin’ with you. You know that you don’t have to put up with nonsense if you don’t want to.
You also understand that your values are non-negotiable, and you will set boundaries when necessary. The way you spend your time is precious, and you want to spend it with people who will lift you up and bring contentment to your life. You also want to spend it doing things that will get you closer to where you want to be, so if it’s not happening, you’re going to find a way.
How to do it: Get really clear on your values. Think about the types of people and activities you want to fill your life with, and let go of any that don’t bring substance to your life.
What If I’m Not A High-Value Person?
Maybe you read those three things and thought, ‘Well shit, I am not a high-value person after all.‘ Well guess what? We all forget to value ourselves; sometimes for a little while, and sometimes for way too long.
The most important thing to remember is that if you want to be a high-value person, you are already on your way to becoming a high-value person. If you seek personal growth and have no desire to let anyone else dictate your life, you’re on the right track. Keep doin’ you, boo.
What does high-value mean to you? Leave a comment below!